well.

i've given up a lot, i try to be good, i try to act the way i wish she had, but apparently i've failed. i've not been who i thought, and i've not been as good as i've thought. there are so many things i want to say, but i know i don't have the words to say it eloquently enough. i've tried but i guess i fail. sounds familiar.. fuck - why? i'm exausted and grouchy and all i wanted was to come home tonight and see the man i love, instead i get nothing. is this how it's always going to be? i've tried. but apparently not enough. jesus.